First off, I apologize again for the radio silence. At least it was only a couple of weeks this time. It has much to do with the odd subject line, although probably not in the way that you would expect. I decided to make this post a little light hearted because of the seriousness of the last post.
So the last two weeks I have had an amazing opportunity to be a counselor for a program called Retreat for Girls at Utah State University. It is an LDS based inspirational program for girls ages 12-15. We lift, inspire and teach young girls and their testimonies in Christ. All while having loads of fun. And as a counselor, get next to zero sleep. It is the best part of my year each time that I have done it.
Second session, when the girls were registering and meeting their counselors Elder Neil L Andersen walked through the door with his granddaughters. There was this sudden stop, then surge of panic through all of the counselors as to who would be entrusted with his precious posterity. We returned to normalcy once he left to drop them off at their dorms. We also were aware of another granddaughter of a different apostle that would be coming that week. That story is for a different time.
The week came and went way too fast. It was filled with joy, the Spirit, many inside jokes, disciplining, some tears, a few drops of blood, much more laughter, and amazing memories. By the end of the week, all of us counselors were exhausted. There were a group of us that were headed to various points between Logan and Provo and so we decided that we should caravan together in order to ensure everyone's safe return home. But first, we needed to stop and eat because there was no dinner provided Friday night. After cleaning up all of our hall decorations, packing up all of the stuff we brought plus the extras we got that week, then saying drawn out goodbyes to our dear, newly made friends, we got to Jimmy John's at about 9:30 at night.
Two of the girls were worried about making it home without falling asleep and so they broke their personal standard and had caffeine for the very first time. They were nervous to see how it effected them, but they knew they needed something to ensure a safe drive. We laughed, reminisced, and carried on despite the workers trying to close around us. At about five after ten, I watched this older couple walk through the doors. The workers informed them that they were closed, so they turned around and began walking to their hotel across the parking lot. When the man turned, it hit me as to why the man looked so familiar. I exclaimed, "Guys, that's L. Tom Perry!" Due to the lack of sleep we all had, it took a couple of times of me saying it for the majority of the group to understand what I had just said. In a mad rush, we grabbed our trash and got out of the restaurant at world record setting pace. The workers were immediately confused and sadly said, "Ok bye." Most of us were too distracted to even think of those who rudely turned away an apostle of the Lord.
When we got out of the restaurant, all kind of stopped short. There he was walking hand in hand with his wife walking slowly to the other side of the lot, and we had no idea what to do to get his attention. So of course the first thing you do is pretend to try to find your car. We had about 6 cars there, but of course he was walking past ours so we needed to quickly come up with another way to pretend run into him.
With our tired minds drawing complete blanks, we followed him to the door of the hotel that he and his wife were staying at. Their key cards weren't working as so we watched him struggle to open the door. Before we could think to offer to help him, a man staying the hotel opened the door for him. They walked in, and our hopes of meeting an apostle quickly faded. The man who opened the door saw our disappointed faces and held the door open for us. We rushed in to see if we could find him. Somehow his aged legs had once again outran us, as we walked into the empty lobby. At this point we kind of regrouped, trying to figure out what had just happened. We asked the girls who just drank caffeine for the first time how they were feeling, and one explained that her heart was racing. Between the panic and the caffeine we could all tell she was a little excited.
As we caught our breath and lowered our heart rates, we once again saw Elder Perry and his wife walk through out the door. Our hopes immediately shot back up, and rushed back out of the lobby after them. We didn't make it past the first row of cars in the lot, suddenly realizing how fast our chances were slipping away. I had the random idea to jump in front of his car, so that he would have to hit me, then check to see if I was okay. Another counselor added on that I might get so hurt, he might have to give me a blessing.
There were three cars leaving at once, so figuring out which one was his was a little difficult. We slowly walked out into the parking lot, only to watch Elder Perry's wife drive there car very slowly out of the lot and our sight. Dragging any hopes of meeting him with them.
At this point, we were still in shock in what was going on. Then one of the counselors shouts, "I'm going to tell those Jimmy John's workers what they just did!" Back across the parking lot we go, and she informs them what they did. The worker she talked to was some high school punk, who just really had no idea who an apostle was, let alone that he turned away one. We walked out and stood on the side walk, and laughed about the events that happened, and the many ways that we messed up. We joked about how it was because of the girls breaking their personal commitments to obtain from caffeine that we had this experience. It was probably the best way we could have ended two amazing weeks of cultivating the spirit. I think we are all still in awe of being able to even be near such an amazing man.
On our drive out of the canyon, I talked with the counselor that I was driving home about what had happened. I told her of an experience 5 years ago, when President Monson sat in front of my high school music group. I talked about how sad it was that the kids had no idea who he was. Then we talked about their special callings and all that being an Apostle entails.
Apostles have an amazing spirit with them. They have the opportunity to commune with the Savior on a different level than you or I. They are called to be special witnesses of His name. They also hold all of the keys of the priesthood. Because of this, they have the spirit with them constantly. As I reflect on this experience, I have come to realize something. The reason why we were so excited and willing to stalk Elder Perry across a parking lot is because we knew what his calling was. We were drawn to the spirit within him, and we wanted to partake in it. We were hesitant to call out to him because we didn't want to bother him. We were like the Woman with the issue of blood, where we wanted to have our spiritual wounds healed, but didn't want to draw attention to ourselves.
This has made me think. How will I react when I see Christ again? Will I turn them away, not knowing he is? Will I turn away, afraid of him being able to see all that I have done? Maybe I will follow after him, trying to continually see him, but unsure of whether or not I will be a bother to him. Or will I call after his name, so that I can fall to his feet, thanking and worshipping him.
Just seeing Elders Perry and Andersen was enough for me to know that they are in fact apostles of the Lord. Feeling of the spirit they carry with them, and seeing the light within their eyes, I know without a doubt they are special witnesses of the Lord. I didn't need to meet them personally to know their words are true, and that they have a special love for me, as a member of this church. But it also gave me a new resolve. I want to be able to have the courage to call out to the Savior, or a representative of him, and present myself as worthy to be in their presence. I want to be able to show my testimony through my eyes, confident of the truth that I know. I don't want to do it out of being able to say that I met them. I want to do it to show them that "I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ" and I am doing all that I can to be a worthy member of his church. They will see that just by looking into my eyes. And I want to be ready for that.
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