I've been reflecting a lot on spiritual wanderings in my life lately. There have been times in my life where in one way or another I felt like I was wondering through the wilderness like the children of Israel. I felt forgotten and forsaken. I had no idea what I was doing or why I was where I was. At times, I still feel that way. My scripture reading today helped me to understand why those times happen.
In my Old Testament class, we are in Deuteronomy. I used to think that this book was SO boring because it just listed the same commandments over and over again, ones that are fulfilled and not used today. As I have been studying though, I have been sucked in to the book. It is Moses' final words to the children of Israel before they go in to the promised land and he translated. And it is FULL of good stuff.
Today I read Deuteronomy 8:2-3. It says:
"And thou shalt remember all the way which the Lord thy God led thee these forty years in the wilderness, to humble thee, and to prove thee, to know what was in thine heart, whether thou wouldst keep his commandments, or no. And he humbled thee, and suffered thee to hunger, and fed thee with manna, which thou newest not, neither did thy fathers know; that he might make thee know that man doth not live by bread only, but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of the Lord doth man live."
The children of Israel were prevented from entering the promised land because of open rebellion and lack of faith. They could have been prevented from going in for 5 or 10 years. But the Lord chose 40. He wanted to see if the children of Israel would return to the commandments. It was time to test them, improve them, and prove to them the many things they can do through him.
The same goes with us and our trials.
Sometimes we feel as though we are in the desert with nothing, forgotten and forsaken. For a long time too, maybe without realizing what we did wrong.
He has not forgotten you. He wants to humble and prove you. He wants to to test your obedience. He wants to teach you that you need to live off the Bread of Life, your Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.
And if you look during your trials of wondering, you will see the hand of the Lord in your life. Maybe you will see it during these times more than the times of prosperity. He still feeds you spiritually despite feeling lost.
The children of Israel ate manna every day of those 40 years of wondering. Many of times, Moses brought forth water when there was none. There multiple occurrences when the Lord protected and provided for the children of Israel, and they weren't even aware of it happening.
The Lord knows you. He knows what you are going through. He knows the person that you can will become because of those things. He has not forgotten you, no matter how much you try to convince yourself he has. He wants you to become better and more like him. Like he did with the children of Israel, he wants to "humble thee, and to prove thee, to know what was in thine heart, whether thou wouldest keep his commandments or no."
Moses said it best when he said:
"Therefore thou shalt love the Lord thy God, and keep his charge, and his statutes, and his judgments, and his commandments, always. And know ye this: for I speak not with your children which have not known, and which have not seen the chastisement of the Lord your God, his greatness, his mighty hand, and his stretch out arm, and his miracles, and his acts, which he did in the midst of Egypt... And what he did unto you in the wilderness, until ye came into this place... But your eyes have seen all the great acts of the Lord which he did. Therefore shall ye keep all the commandments which I command you this day, that ye may be strong. and go in and possess the land, whither ye go to possess it."
We cannot see all of the miracles that are performed in our lives, but they happen. The Lord shapes your life so that you can become the best. Keep his commandments and prove worthy so that you can be strong. If you do this, then you will possess your promised blessings, exaltation. It is his "work and glory to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man" (Moses 1:39). Your trials are doing just that. Helping you to become stronger in your faith and obedience so that you can enter into his rest when you have completed all that he has for you.
