Why bad things happen to good people

When I was in high school I really struggled with something. I felt like no matter how hard I tried to be good, bad things still happened to me. Looking back at it, that wasn't really the case, but it appeared to me at the time. 

My first year at school, it became worse. Winter semester I went through trial after trial, difficulty after difficulty all while I was doing my absolute best to be as righteous as possible. And when I asked if I could serve a mission, I was shut down. Meanwhile I looked at my sister who made some hard choices and fell from the church. Sometimes she made baby steps back to church, other times she stepped further from the church. And yet, she got everything she wanted. Right away, she got into a school program that had year long waiting list. She got her dream job straight out of school. She was living for free at my parents house. Everything seemed to fall out of my lap and into hers. And I could not possibly imagine why that could be.

I spent my whole life learning that when you're righteous, you get blessings. When you aren't righteous, you lose those blessings you could have had. But then I found myself wondering, well then why am I having the hardest time, but doing my best to be righteous? Where are my blessings?

Now I was also taught that just because you were righteous, doesn't mean life was going to be easy. You will just have access to and the faith to be the blessings that you need to get through your hard difficulties. And I totally understand that.

Then why was it that my sister was getting everything she wanted? 

But really, she didn't get everything she wanted. She is dealing with the consequences of her actions and will for the rest of her life. 

The lesson here is that blessings come when you need it. 

Our Heavenly Father knows exactly what we need when we need it. My sister is dealing with hard things that make life really difficult for her. So she needed those things that she had dreamed for to let her know that our Heavenly Father was there watching her and knew she was there and aware of her dreams and wishes.

I am a really rough stone. I have very difficult edges and sharp crevices. The challenges that are brought to my life are to polish those ugly and not needed things away. Heavenly Father is polishing me into something beautiful. He knows exactly the person that He wants me to be. He knows that potential and the abilities that I have. So He is putting trials and challenges in my life so that I can become that person. 

Heavenly Father is aware of each of us. When hard times come to us, it isn't because He turned His back or we aren't worthy of His love. It is the opposite. It is because He is watching so much more closely, watching for that hard edge to become a beautiful shine in the work of art He is creating. He is standing there with His arms open, waiting for us to turn to Him.

There is a saying in our church that God won't give us anything that we can't handle. While it does have some truth to it, it isn't fully true. He is trying to get us to progress and become better. So He is going to give us something just over that line that we can handle so that we can become that much better. 

The best part though is that He doesn't leave us to do it alone. He is there every step, every tear, every exasperated sigh, every crushing blow from the trial. He is there. Watching, standing there, holding out His hand to guide us through. It is up to us to turn to Him.

Recently, though, I came up with another reason as to why bad things happen to good people. This summer I had the AMAZING opportunity to work at this camp called Retreat For Girls. It is a camp where girls get a week to take a retreat from the world and work on themselves. They learn about their Heavenly Father, how to talk to Him, that He is there for them, and how to be the best example of Him in their lives. It is LDS faith based, but is open to any and all faiths. And coming from someone who got to see all of the inner workings, it is an amazing and inspired program. 

The director is one of the best people I have ever had the experience of being around. I am so grateful that I got to meet her and learn from her for those two weeks I worked for her. Her family goes through a lot of trials though. Tonight I just saw a post for something else to have come to her family. I am in awe at how well their family goes through it. Truly some of the best people. 

I was talking to my mom about it and it hit me. It hit me as to why their family has a lot of trials. Why my family has a lot of trials. Why people in my ward have a lot trials. It is the adversary working on us. Working trying hard for us to not reach that potential Heavenly Father sees in us. Working to prevent us from being able to accomplish the great work He has in store for us. 

Why doesn't Heavenly Father stop Him? Because it is a test. A test of strength and will to get through the hard times. When we came to this Earth, we knew it wasn't going to be easy and it would be full of tests. He wants to see us stick to what we believe in. He wants to see us stand strong throughout all difficult times. 

There is a quote that is in the Testing Center at BYU. It goes something like, be grateful for life's tests, because if you aren't being tested, you aren't worth testing. Something along those lines. Yes hard times suck. But you aren't going through them because you suck. Exact opposite. You're going through these hard times because you are awesome. And you are worth the tests of life.

We came to be tested. But we didn't come to be tested alone. Pray with all earnestness of heart. Ask for divine help and strength. And He will give it to you. You may think He didn't hear and answer you request, but I assure you He will and does. It isn't going to be big and flashy. It isn't going to jump out of the bushes and say "Here I am. Here is the strength you asked for." It isn't going to be pixie dust dumped on you. It is going to be exact to how you need. Just don't be too blind to see it.

Next time you have a bad day, ask yourself, "How did I get through it?" "How did I get the help I need?" I assure you the answer will be because the Lord gave me the strength I needed. 

He is there. Please, oh please, turn to Him and ask for His help. I have tried to go through hard times both ways. I assure you it is so much more bearable to go through with someone who knows where you have been, like Christ has, than by yourself.